Veličenstvo.com

The Secret of Calimero's Childhood Revealed

2011-05-24T23:19:00.003+02:00

Welcome To The ZOO

2011-05-16T22:37:00.008+02:00

Pigeon, Monkey, Phoenix and Little Animal Obviously. That is all I know about the last weekend. I'm sorry but I was sleeping all the time.

All started on Saturday at 9 AM: the departure was scheduled from Holešovice, but His Majesty was sleeping. And so went the rest of Saturday and Sunday. The results were cruel and the party is covered in haze...

So here are the maps from "Snivel Peak" and "Planet of the Apes"

Are You Ready?!

2011-02-21T22:25:00.000+01:00

Getting Ready for The Star Fight

2011-02-17T23:39:00.002+01:00

Mullet Power

2010-10-14T19:37:00.001+02:00

Balkan Tour Continues

2010-09-19T22:04:00.006+02:00

The intenational Balkan long championship took place in Tsirkvets i Iglavogradu (awesome place well-known for its rendering plant). The competiton was tough from all of the Balkan countries and belonging territories like Hungary and Slovakia. Also many Czech competitors arrived to prove their skill in the terrains of Bulgarian Highlands.

The mental power of His Majesty was at very high level because of Freud cereals. The Elite final (H21E) was really close according to Our shameful performance. But lately some signs were uncovered that there were not so many runners being able to reach the highest level for Sunday race. So His Majesty had to content Ourself with the participation in H21D. (This category is very similar to D21H. That means adult gynander like Caster Semenaya.)

We are not sure if the name of city Třešť is from Bulgarian word „distillate“ or „punishment“ but this two words together are like synonym to the place of Our accomodation. Exactly His Majesty were not accomodate at all. We spent the whole night by the local tradition – Iglavograd hedgehog hunting. It was very exciting experinece but We warn You not to mix hedgehog hunting with hunting for Rudolphus little-deer...

So that was another Balkan experience. We would better not write about Our Sunday „run“. You can look in the results if You want to see another wretched race of His Majesty.

Let's Make Some Noise?

2010-06-16T19:37:00.003+02:00

No PPŽ at Hostivař dam because of bzzz zzz wuuu bzzzzzzz. Bzzzz bzzzzz zz zzzzzzz bzzzzzzzz. So bzzzz at Hvězda. Wzzzzzzzz buuuuuuuuuu wuuu zzzz bzzzzzz. Bzzzz wzzzzzz bz zzzzzzzz football.

Bzzzzz dzz buuuu wzzzzzz. See You in Summer at Coolstrea. Bzzzzzz Howgh

No Show, No Go

2010-06-11T14:32:00.004+02:00

No money, no wild card, no middle, no fame, no sponsors, no money...

...checkmate - king is death

Carousel of Death

2010-06-10T22:10:00.002+02:00

CTU summoned His Majesty for another orienteering fight at Czech Academic Games.

Saturday middle distance signified a great success of His Majesty. The time was not good enough but the Demon of Ben who started two minutes after Us did not catch Us up. Apparently it happened regarding that double-J did not arrive.
But Our performance was still good enough to defeat some big fishes of orienteering ("Stuffed cake thug", "C₅H₅N", "Cholerrhagia").

Sunday long distance was very cruel. Under some extemporary circumstances Our performance became a partial failure.

The main reasons were: temperature attacking hundred degrees of Fahrenheit; excessive consumption of beer-plague; sleeping in the doorframe; phenomenon of migrating North.

As You can see in the map below the competition was tough

I go on VI

2010-06-09T20:07:00.004+02:00

As I visited the Czech Academic Games I obtained a reproach from "the one who can carry checkpoint-holder between his legs" why there is so much of fucking nothing on Veličentvo.com... So I promise I will bring some reports from the latest events reporting famous escapades about "the one who sleeps in the doorframe."

Happy Jubilee

2010-02-12T18:06:00.003+01:00

Four thousand visitors on this site since the re-start at the beginning of 2008. Great job. Let's celebrate now!

DDT - The Dynamic Diamonds Theory

2010-02-10T10:33:00.000+01:00

The Diamond Theory

2010-02-10T00:45:00.002+01:00

4th NP LOB -B3 at the Free Order

2010-02-05T01:05:00.004+01:00

The fourth night park ski-o event took place at the Gulch of Suffusions. His Majesty made some mistakes but We were still able to achieve top ten in the final standing. We got lost at the route from 11 to 8 and We lost Our way to the bridge and the brook-crossing was very cold.

This weekend His Majesty will try to survive another Ski-O stand at the Three Wells near the New Bulgarian Settlement. As seen below the understanding with the natives would be difficult.

A Quarter-thousand of Minutes in the Forest

2010-02-03T12:01:00.008+01:00

Exactly our performance on both weekend Championships took 251 :15. That means over fifteen thousands seconds of excessive strain...ugh!

... but His Majesty is improving on long distance. Last year Our result at the race of Northstar Tirana was +79 minutes. This year it is only +60 minutes.
I must say: keep moving His Majesty and You will not be competition nihilist anymore!

Here is the map from the race with a very important message from the organizers:

Czech Long Ski-O Championship 2010

2010-01-28T18:37:00.004+01:00

Here is the startlist for the ultimate race of this Ski-O season.

His Majesty is looking forward for another three hours in forest near Appleton on Gleet on Saturday. On Sunday His Majesty is very proud to perform in the second team of Kotlářka.

Night Parking

2010-01-27T22:50:00.003+01:00

Another phenomenal Ski-O performance of His Majesty, this time at the Miltville Woods. Let's wait for the results. I can provide you only the map with my route-choice so far.

Updated on 01/28/2010
Great performance lead to magnificient 11th place. The cold was tough and so is His Majesty.

TdB 2010 - E1 - Summary

2010-01-24T22:31:00.007+01:00

The first episode of Tour de Balkan 2010 is over.

The first competiton, Czech Championship on middle distance, was very fucking. In substance the ending was like space odyssey to the balls of Hercules.

The long distance on Sunday was surprisingly luxurious. And so was the performance of His Majesty. Here is the map with my route-choice.

Tour de Balkan 2010 - Episode 1

2010-01-22T00:25:00.006+01:00

Thanks to competition comittee the first Ski-O weekend will be held at Vrbnö ë Mali i Korabit. His Majesty will be there alive and competing. Startlist of Championship contains 33 competitors so we hope that this time performance of His Majesty will be enough to reach the best fifty...

...otherwise the result is not everything. The mountains of Shqipëria are very beautiful. And the skyline of Vrbno is very fine (as seen in the picture below) .

White Star

2010-01-16T00:48:00.003+01:00

His Majesty, former Ski-O Elite runner, was not able to keep up pace with the best competitors. But his 7th place among more than seventy runners is marvellous. His Majesty has never ran a night race before and his ski training this season is very modest.

Here are some very famous names which His Majesty left behind:
Gay
Who Is Fucking
Little Wild-boar
Cartoon Chicken
Shelf
Human Positives Set
Red Rock Jumper
Bauer
and Žižka

Black and white map of White Star with Our routechoice

Financial Crisis Slowed Down Shooting

2009-10-03T21:22:00.003+02:00

Do You remember the most pretentious project of His Majesty?
Pontifical and grandiose movie "His Majesty Rolls Along"?
The crisis spreading over Our gracious kingdom stopped the work on this marvellous masterpiece....

...but nowadays things are getting better and better. And His Majesty is very proud to present You a new extra-ordinary trailer of this remarkable artwork.

So here You are...
Look! Listen! Admire!
His Majesty will inspire!

Eastern Bohemia = Promised Land

2009-10-01T00:46:00.009+02:00

The land of early getting up...
The land of everlasting bombs...
The triangle of marvellous refreshment...

... here is the Crystal Palace of this Bakery Warlord, the Master of Flour and Commander of Dough...

... and finally that's him. The magnificient king of bombs for Your mature!

Waterville Carp Is Getting Near

2009-09-16T04:00:00.001+02:00

If You do not know what Waterville Carp is about then You cannot miss an extra-ordinary documentary film about the last volume of this magnificient event.

Heavy Wound Slowed Down Our Training

2009-09-02T02:03:00.002+02:00

SCP? Sparta Crusty Pseudoraces

2009-05-31T17:35:00.004+02:00

His Majesty has visited another fucking race. Yesterday Slavia Prague has won the League Chamionship in soccer and the day after His Majesty has visited a competition organised by recently second. After the celebrations to gain success was very hard.

As usually I do not have map from this event. So You can look at my route on the map from Czech map server. Sorry for low quality but my skills with paintbrush are insufficient.

Magnus Hummus Cup Sprint And Relays

2009-05-26T21:52:00.004+02:00

In a flash: no maps = no stupid article.

But I have one very interesting hint: after finishing your race, find out if you are not supposed to run another race the same day. Sometimes it is better to wait for the evening to start a party.

But His Majesty must perform his tasks:
Before the Saturday relays started His Majesty had to greet with four envoys from Montenegro, one from Siberia and one from Laughtertown.

Citizen Majesty Roll Along

2009-05-21T23:17:00.007+02:00

Action film about love to run.

Comming never to Your local cinema.

Trailer available now only at Veličenstvo.com

Special thanks to Adidas, Puma and Cannon to make the dream come True!

Rocky Majesty Rocks

2009-05-14T12:18:00.001+02:00

PPŽ At Girl's Jump

2009-05-13T18:00:00.002+02:00

6PM - Last man started. So here is the map - without my routechoice. Sorry maybe later.
My time is about 32:32 (without return to the last control - I will write about it maybe later). There were no signs of Muck-a-muck at the event but my shape signs that it will power on...maybe later.

I go on V AKA Muck-a-muck Fight 315

2009-05-13T10:19:00.002+02:00

Do You remember famous dog-fights between HM and MaM? Next volume comes out today!
If You want to see it then visit Anti-George-W. Town in the afternoon . The event takes place at the map called "Little Jug" (also known as "Small Tit", "Tiny Boob" or "Poky Breast").

Best Achievments On Classic And Middle Distance This Season

2009-05-13T09:59:00.000+02:00

His Majesty are in form! What a great performance They performed! They scored nearly 1O.0oO Ranking points - though it is sum from middle and classic together it still an amazing outcome.
The evening was quite fine. His Majesty celebrated reunion with Praga Death and Voyeur got beaten up.

Here are the maps form this week:

Yom Kippur Week

2009-05-08T22:00:00.000+02:00

What to write about Tuesday sprint at The Ovens of Slavia? His Majesty screwed it as usually. Looser combination is 7-9-8-9:-) ROFL PIMP

But now His Majesty is looking forward for another competition. Czech 2nd division take place near Soonvile and is organized by Jews of My Castle. And the main goal is to defeat somebody to claim HM is better than SK Slavia.

I hope His Majesty could manage it.

Prague Sprint Championship AKA I go on IV

2009-05-04T23:47:00.003+02:00

His Majesty are back and They will compete today at Prague Sprint Championship. They hope Their first start in season 2009 will claim that They are not competitive nihilst and prove that They belong to the best 95 sprint runners in Prague.

See Ya today at the Springfield Elementary School

Thousand Times One Story From Parties With His Majesty

2009-04-26T17:54:00.005+02:00

With a glimmer of smile and already overdoped
by Beartown Bear 11°

Ban Communist Ben

2009-04-20T14:33:00.005+02:00

Say no to censorship!

Don't support activites against freedom!

Listen to McCarthy and do not behave like Rosenberg and his wife!

Supereaster Superstar

2009-04-15T00:11:00.003+02:00

Plenty of famous movie stars arranged a meeting at the Windows NT 3.1 pub. And His Majesty was there also!

Where Is The Expected Post About Albania Orienteering?

2009-02-20T13:03:00.006+01:00

I hoped to write about this:
but cruel 5Ocent Pašek forced me to learn this:

Prize-giving ceremony is held at 3 PM at the Temple of Doom.
Let's wait for the results, but His Majesty is predestinate to gain letters (DNF, DISQ etc.) instead of figures (1,2,3...)

Greetings In 2 0009

2009-02-15T20:36:00.002+01:00

We hope You didn't miss Our bad english and stupid sense of humour... but Veličenstvo is back!

"It's time for another blog post."

More to come recently... perhaps

Winner

2008-11-23T23:59:00.001+01:00

His Majstey pretends to be the True fictive runner. More here.

Final Score

2008-11-09T23:06:00.000+01:00

1.11.2007 - 31.10.2008: 788 pieces

Majesty Premium Collection 2009

2008-11-03T01:32:00.001+01:00

AI Meance

2008-11-01T18:26:00.004+01:00

I haven't published any post lately... but they nearly got me.
Read. The human race is in danger.
The Internet know must face the threatening attack of Japanese Artificial Net-Scribes Association...
I think you have already met the new prototype: Japanese Intelligent Robot I - unbelievable efficient spamming machine.
Don't try to respond it. It is immune to discusion, offences etc.
This technology is only few years old but obviously very elaborate... so I can write about it here on Veličenstvo.com because it can't break through the under 18 prohibition.
Pardon my mistakes. I must go.
See you in hell if they found me.

ps... and listen here - maybe Vapours were right...

Pornienteering

2008-09-22T13:15:00.008+02:00

Once upon a time knight of Pirin published this comment. I hoped he was right... But now I see that having a porn site is much more prestige for O-runners than blogging. Blame on those pervert suckers whether they are frogscreamers or prague bitches.

Here are the most vicious derelicts:

Fairy-tale about fairy-tail: Zelda porn

Czech porn model Pařič Lorenc

X-Pirin - no comment

Update 09/24/2008

So I started my own page with sucking 10 seconds movies.
Oh, did I forget to tell you my second name was Arthur?!

Veličenstvo.com's Ressurection AKA I go on V

2008-09-10T23:11:00.003+02:00

WTF, His Majesty is pissed off, Veličenstvo.com's blog is pissed off and another VRL competition is obviously pissed off too...

But what I wanted to say:
In 2008 someone claimed protest about sprint competiton because of unsurpassable cliff...

In 2005 someone claimed title from the national sprint championship by surpassing unsurpassable cliff...

HOWGH

Beerienteering Leads To Supremacy

2008-07-21T00:25:00.004+02:00

Great Britain has done it. They are now the True Champions... and His Majesty knows the reason why. The spies of Veličenstvo.com have investigated new progressive training methods in the UK. Here is one exclusive picture of beerienteering:

So maybe attitude of BT is right...

Find Roland Quiz, What?!

2008-06-15T20:00:00.001+02:00

Today is the day after The Day of Saint Roland, what?! And His Majesty with the help of Roland Bakery presents special contest for You, what?! Try to find Roland (or Rolands or Rolandas), what?!

Please send Your answers to:

Mr. Roland Bomba
Pekařství Roland
Kohoutovice
PSČ 10 20 30

10.6.2001

2008-06-10T14:00:00.002+02:00

Have You ever dreamt of seeing such a star?

Have You ever wanted to meet the legendary heroes of orienteering?

Have You ever imagined sharing the podium with the O-blog leaders?

To reach such a goal is terribly hard today for His Majesty... but his dream have come True already.

Banana Crop In Progress

2008-06-10T01:00:00.002+02:00

From our foreign correspondent: Did You also think that banana crop is a domain of tropical countries? But new banana plantation are in bonanza not far from the Czech-Bulgarian borders. The banana plantation was founded by Xi Xao, native African transported to Czech Republic by Carpet-Runner.
The main production of bananas goes into the market by notorious enterprise Banana Trade Ltd. Alas latest news speaks about a man from Slovakia who offered the highest bid and got the crushing majority of the banana crop (rumours tell the bananas will help him to feed his herd of kangaroos).
However some voices of frustration roar from the capital of Bulgaria. The envious warrior from Zulu Banana Mob claims that banana growing is a domain of Zulus and that he will try to rob the Slovakian bananas.

The Lame Warrior from ZBM

Once Upon a Time

2008-06-06T10:50:00.003+02:00

The black sheep tried to redeem himself. Pally wasn't cake-eater. And 'strejdo' was familiar title among O-runners. Sounds like a fairy-tale? Than look here.

New Banana Advertisement

2008-06-01T14:19:00.002+02:00

Caution: All rights were violated

Are You Also Looking Forward To The Disciplinary Comitee Verdict?

2008-05-28T01:27:00.003+02:00

Than try the web pages of disciplinary comitee advisor, here.

Jersey change, what???

2008-05-23T16:07:00.003+02:00

Is His Majesty trying to get to the innocent team with friendship and cakes abundant? Let's see tommorrow...

Champions!

2008-05-19T14:31:00.002+02:00

Do You Know BT, What?

2008-05-12T15:49:00.004+02:00

And do You know about their silly consumption limit, what? One beer per day, what? Sounds like a joke for His Majesty - tommorow he scored the number 371 since the beginning of November, what?

O-season 2008 In Danger, what!

2008-04-23T19:55:00.000+02:00

You know orienteering is everything for me. I really love this game! But I am the Majesty and I do have work to do. Recently I must supervise the pigeon breeding for RPRA.

The pigeons are breeded in cage nests (that's reason why our kingdom was expelled from UN).

You can see below the opinion of royal pigeons about orienteering.
I hope that Mental-power leader would comment it: "Several pigeons were going to the toilet with amazing shits. To achive a success with such shoes will be terribly hard."

One Small Victory, what???

2008-04-16T23:34:00.004+02:00

What are you talking about you small dicks dlabaja.com and jiřin.biz... and what about zhaly.kom - oops Slavia did it again, what? A BIG VICTORY!!!! yeah

The Veličenstvo.com's Paradox

2008-04-13T15:33:00.001+02:00

I've visited Karlštejn two times recently. Last weekend during SCM training o-camp I learned two thhings: first - I am sucking o-looser (no shape, no mental power, no concentration) , second - Karlštejn is a baroque mansion... But yesterday Karlštejn was neogothic castle. WTF! Maybe the problem was in my consumption. My hint: never drink curacao after 3 AM...

But that was only prologue. On Saturday I tried harder. But warning: drinking 13 beers can cause misfortune. Anyway combination of Havana club and Griotte is not as good as it could look like. My misfortune was that I had to buy special ticket for my monkey which hung over into cat during my journey to Caput Regia.

The final highlight: Meeting my real ex-girlfried in the mass transit. I was brutally bailed like sailor, she was returning from Sunday's worship. Looks like one of us has lost the right way. Anyway if you want to meet some unreal ex-girlfriends than visit www.realexgirlfriend.com.

That's all. Red and White pride is calling me for another crushing victory! (I hope our players will stay on the pitch, like Blažek, Pudil and Abraham did in 2006, info here)

Funeral Notice

2008-04-11T15:33:00.000+02:00

Yet another life spoiled by the cruel monarch Veličenstvo.com. After destroying the O-career of His Majesty.cz and personal life of Martin Vlach (anyway who the hell is Martin Vlach?) the tyranny has claimed next victim...

Entered Into Rest

Funeral service will be held next Tuesday at Parrot Garage

Across Cinemas Not Only In Civilized Europe Soon!!!

2008-04-08T01:00:00.002+02:00

After overwhelming succes of 8 Gays story another astonishing movie is being shot right now, what? The Legend of Zelda: The Hero of Time will bring light to the crumpled cake cause, what? The supervisor of the movie is Roland who only knows what we did last summer, what?... Here is trailer, what? Do not miss Our Greatness at 1:00, what?

1.9.2007 about midnight: Zelda vs. Ganondorf

Bonus: From the Zelda's fans forum about the new movie:
anonymous disciplinarka writes: "Ganondorf you idiot recover yourself, decent mister Zelda had to calm you down because you were behaving like the biggest dick. Drunk, agressive and furthemore dumb. You are the one to visit the disciplinary comitee and get ban forever. Why don't you feel ashamed, if I were you I would creep through the biggest sewers. You would rather be that you have such good friends that take yours side even when they know you're swine!!!"

Easter Aftermath

2008-04-03T02:23:00.006+02:00

No beer have I drunk since Tuesday so I can do some sober look back over my shoulder and over the Sandstone Easter. My blog honour order me to response to Dlabaja.com's complaint about the little big stone cause. I admit my fault that I used an object in map which is not intended to be a control.

As you can see in the picture the new maps of our club are equipped with a sophisticated system of microstones. This feature of our maps is incommutable and more precious than human fingerprint. This conclusive evidence of intellectual property will prevent from map-stealing and will make the world a better place to live. In addition the more north of Prague the better the microstones net is.

Abstinence Is Not So Easy

2008-03-30T05:51:00.004+02:00

WTF! I have done a terrible mistake. I thought I would rise the spirit of Mother Lasana and Diesana for better luck in Saturdays sprint event... Alas I rose the spiritus of Lesana. I would never think that only one letter could cause such lack of mental power... Anyway I did my duty and finished right before Death Summoners and Alice's Fuckers...

P.S. From Yesterdays Results
Legend says - Spartans: Taught never to retreat, never to surrender.
But reality - sprint 2,7 km

Špringer Tomáš   TJ Slovan Luhačovice LCE8101    DISK
Štěpánek Ondřej  AC Sparta Praha      SCP8304    DISK
Havlena Martin   OK Jihlava           SJI8310    DISK
Zajíc Vítězslav  KOB TRETRA Praha     TAP8610    DISK
Rakovec Michal   AC Sparta Praha      SCP6901    DISK
Brabač Lukáš     AC Sparta Praha      SCP8505    DISK
Přeček Zdeněk    AC Sparta Praha      SCP5200    DISK
Štemberk Adam    TJ Lokomotiva Beroun LBE8904    DISK

Across Cinemas In Europe Right Now!!!

2008-03-26T22:50:00.006+01:00

Veličenstvo.com - Fair Game !

2008-03-25T20:59:00.004+01:00

The situation of His Majesty isn't as pink as the future of eight gays but the boldness of some Czech tabloids as Aha or Jerk-off OSS is flagrant! So Veličenstvo.com proclaims death to all parasites, paparazzis, human-beasts and hyenas!

Long Live The Monkey King

2008-03-24T13:30:00.003+01:00

Fifteen years went by since the last visit of Xuan Zang. But His Majesty remembers as it was yesterday...

Videos from Xuan's visit in 1991 and 1993 can be found here.

The Salvation Has Come

2008-03-24T12:00:00.008+01:00

Tuesday:

8 pieces

Wednesday:

2 pieces

---
Maundy Thursday:

8 pieces

.---
Good Friday:

8 pieces

---
Holy Saturday:

10 pieces

---
Easter Day:

Resurrection

Miloš Frýba's Birthday Today!

2008-03-18T23:55:00.001+01:00

In the renovated pub at the Dejvice railway station. The only letters of apologies are received from those who participated at Roland's anniversary party of 8-Hot Majesty in Hradec... Those who didn't congratulate His Majesty or Miloš can lick their assholes also.

Too Many Unique Events This Weekend

2008-03-16T23:50:00.001+01:00

I. Another Beermental has been awarded for his service to His Majesty of safe-conduct over sixteen enemy domains. This time honour goes to Whip.
II. Onanos gas station and Adalbert also had run out of Braník after our raid! Alas one bottle of Moon Shine was pillaged too...
III. Ivan is Zdenda. Zdenda is killer.
IV. We were supposed to end at the Blue Oyster but our terminal was Roland bar, what?
V. Billy-goat didn't turn into gardener but he stole place of His Majesty.

Attention: Using Frapecit in the morning cause dysemesia!

Who The Hell Is Martin Vlach?

2008-03-15T00:01:00.001+01:00

An elaborated research with very surprising outcome has been finished recently. The answer to the main question originally formulated by Romanian wiseman Little Animal is still indistinguishable. But now it seem that the predecessors of Martin Vlach came from Šumperk.

More here.

No Spring Cup This Year

2008-03-11T00:01:00.002+01:00

Don't try to ask me why. Even if you like to jerk-off hundred minutes on flat-shit terrain to learn at the finish you category was cancelled. I decide to try my luck at Bone Castle.
But His Majesty can't miss the Saturday night fever - the 69th anniversary of occupation. Does anybody else have some better reason for such a celebration?!

Also the Sunday relay competiton is very challenging. But will His Majesty be able to repeat phenomenal lack of respect like last year?

The picture shows His Majesty leading his warriors to the battle with the help of faithful knight of both Muck-a-Muck

You can see more here in the first act. I hope you know that I hate Sparta but everything that is against Praga is very fine.

Spring Sprint Sucks

2008-03-10T01:00:00.001+01:00

This is an article response to My first time.

About His Majesty's response to Zhaly.kom's training:

After more than two hours of excrutiation His Majesty nearly got lost on the way from Rocky Peak (as you can see in the picture below)... Regrettably His Majesty found the way Out Of The Dark and you will not be saved from other fucking articles at Veličenstvo.com...

Beer Contest

2008-03-03T21:09:00.001+01:00

Do you know what size is the biggest beer bottle opener in the world?!

The first and only prize is a bottle of Braník opened by this opener. Fortunately His Majesty knows the precious answer and is sure to win. However you can try not to beat him and write your answers in the comments.

2 Matches, 3 Teams of Prague Bitches, 5 Goals

2008-03-02T23:45:00.002+01:00

That' s my score from this weekend another fucking Gambrinus league visit...

..Anyway I think I will leave out the match of AC Suckers who play tommorrow at Thracian lowlands.

From Today's News

2008-03-02T00:01:00.001+01:00

Another assassination attemp on His Majesty has failed.

Meridian losers from SMB tried to kill the king on his return from a state call at Jizerka. Their sabotage of a high voltage mast near Mladá Boleslav was successful but they hopefully didn't manage to hit the king's coach. This act of terror was planned as a revenge for the crushing criticism of last year's O-event at Peppermint.

Advance From E to A!!!

2008-02-27T23:35:00.004+01:00

This progress is like a little miracle at school. And so it is at Czech ski-o. Finally I seized the 29th spot in mens Elite. I hope that is not really final ranking because before me there is one cheater from "notorious movement Beerme(n)tal" (quotation: Baba Jaga on BEN). Maybe Whip has taken some lessons of dirty O-tricking from M.H.
Anyway Whip has also taken some pictures of His Majesty before Sunday race...

"Rather drinking fernet than reading shits on the internet! "

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh (4x)

2008-02-24T22:48:00.011+01:00

Friday: Beer prologue at Sandokans

Saturday: I was celebrating the gain of A-licence at ski-O. I nearly lost my jacket. I absolutely lost myself. But Tarzan Boy, Who Is Fucking Alice and Lady Karneval performed by Duo Pe was worth it... Luckily I found myself sabre-dancing at my accommodation and my jacket in next-door class. Great training for Waterville Carp!

Sunday: 136 minutes on classic distance. I could easily say that 'i wasn't prepared for such race' or narrate fairy-tales about 'lack of mental power' and 'run under my possibilities' like some self-confident Bulgarian blogger... But His Majesty can't afford such a freaky alibism.
I pay special tribute to the refreshment station with Cloister beer and my mental power leader to the control 14-49 (see bellow) Bokovka the Traincrusher. Well done!

New Ski-O discipline - Jerk O-ff controls

Which of these controls do you admire the most? What do you think about two exclamation marks at control 14-49? Share your thoughts at comments or vote in the poll.

"Le Coq Braisé"

2008-02-21T00:39:00.007+01:00

Two thousands years ago

The painting depicts the legend of the roasted cock at King Herod's table that crowed Christ the Saviour is born.

Today

King Jarolim is feasting on what remains from London cocks after Red 'n White hurricane has plundered the White Hart Lane.

Elite Last Stand

2008-02-20T13:30:00.002+01:00

The finish of this year ski-O season is comming on. It's been very long season as usual and the competition is very tough too. This week will be a great challenge to achieve at least the 25th spot to save Elite for next year. After half-success in my Elite premiere weekend (I was the last one only on Sunday) I am occupying the 24th spot only 0.97 pt ahead another blue and white gangster South-paw...

Two championships take place on Saturday. Great chance for me to beat some A-category runners and to not finish on the last place.

On Sunday the organizers promise shorten classic distance. I hope the courses aren't prepared by Hendy senior because his shorten classic would be only ultra long.

Cold News

2008-02-17T01:31:00.003+01:00

Veličenstvo.com got sick by calimero flu (the most malign kind of H5N1)

His Majesty.cz is on vacancy. No training since Monday

Majesty Kim Ir-sen the Dictator was re-elected

Falco is still dead

Who driks in winter isn't thirsty in summer

2008-02-02T21:45:00.000+01:00

So was said by Czech O-team headcoach. And if I want to be successful (as I am supposed to be) I must improve my beerborec account to 1000 beers until the start of summer season. So I started:
Wednesday: I needed to release the tension so I was pumping. Four times in two hours.
Thursday: My ignorance of building materials is startling! I never thought drinking of ready mix concrete would cause diarrhoea!
Friday: WTF! Drinking Wince beer cause diarrhoea too.

Veličenstvo.com Resurrection II AKA I go on IV

2008-02-01T13:01:00.000+01:00

The three months banishment is over. So is winter season. And Veličenstvo.com is back! From the beginning of February I must focus on mental power renewal and self publishing. The articles will be partially my own intellectual property but the theme is stolen from Zhaly.kom's founding idea - a reduce fat blog. As I realised that my weight is only 50 kilos (maybe 50 cent) less than Eminem's (more here), I do have work to do.